By Dan on July 18, 2009 8:41 AM
Words spoken to Richard Feynman from his wife, also the title of the second book of his memoires.
What do I care what people think? I spend too much of my life concerned with what people think. I let it stress me out. I live far too much with what-ifs. I concern myself with what people think about me, even people who are no longer in my life, people no longer likely to be in my life, people who have caused me a lot of pain are only in my life as historical lessons.
And yet I still care what people think.
I try not to. I see a lot of my friends just doing their thing and they seem so comfortable in their own skin, just doing whatever they want to. If they piss someone off, so be it. It's not like they can't make ammends. They seem free, they have fun, they live their own lives.
So what do I care what people think?
For the longest time a tenant of my life was to strive for an unattainable perfection. To be the best I could be. To compromise when I should, to avoid conflict, to life a peaceful and giving life. Not all of those things work all the time but here I am left with the residue of that lifestyle.
To a certain ex of mine: you did a lot of damage to me with your hollow promises and your hypocritical idealisms. You failed to live your life in the way that you wanted others to live around you. You caused me years of pain and harm. I steer clear of your path but I no longer care what the fuck you think as you are dead to me. I think I cared the most in my life what you thought. You told me you didn't deserve me, you were right. Now you don't have me and I'm finally fine with that.
What do I care what people think? I don't know. But I think I still care too much. How does one unlearn this?
By Dan on July 14, 2009 3:36 PM
This site has been around a while now. It's been through several frameworks starting with the old WebKit Fusion framework. This was replaced by the WebKit PageEdit platform. Both of those ran on ColdFusion. Tonight I am pleased to unwrap the newest version running on the new WebKit Mercury framework! This one is built on PHP and keeps this site in sync with the direction of WebKit.
Each picture on this site now has a distinct, SEO-friendly URL. Each picture is now served with a static URL as well, bypassing any engine-processing. All of the thumbnails on this site are now consistent in size and cropped as squares. We're running on a new blog module and a new content management module.
Mercury is also equipped to offer social networking capabilities, sort of like Facebook. This means forums, profiles, messaging, public and private groups and a whole lot more. Most of those features don't really pertain to this site but I have a few other sites that will hopefully be launching before too very long that will be using it.
If you have any feedback for me, or if you find any bugs, please use the contact page to let me know!
By Dan on July 13, 2009 12:34 PM
Here is a shot of Alyx Webb from one of the IniquiTeaser events.
By Dan on July 10, 2009 5:41 PM
I have rebuilt this entire site in my new Mercury engine. I plan to give it a facelift at some point in the near future.
I moved 115 categories of photos and almost 3000 actual photos. I ported the blog over and made a bunch of tweaks to Mercury to make it all happen.
I've enjoyed the ColdFusion run but I have to admit that I'm super jazzed about the new PHP framework i've built and am deploying. Mercury is the best thing I've ever built.
By Dan on June 13, 2009 8:51 AM
It's been a while since I've posted. Here is a shot of me and Cassandra. Thanks to Norris for the use of his system to shoot this.
By Dan on March 07, 2009 9:04 AM
Here she is. The card series is my idea, the Day of the Dead theme was hers. She did the makeup, I did the photography and the post-. Enjoy!